EDDFIRST and STAR CO met in Champions League Fixture 3 at Boxpark Croydon. STAR CO won the coin toss and chose to go first. Margs reacts to EDDFIRST's closer with 'that's three' and tells STAR CO he got killed, but the battle is still sent to the QR and website vote and no completed tally is preserved. The result below remains an independent LOTA review rather than an official PenGame decision.
STAR CO's first committed to an extended weight attack. EDDFIRST became Snorlax, too large for a Poké Ball and unable to finish a PenGame foot race. His name supposedly held weight only because his belly had become involved. Jelly Babies, sharing sweets and eating alone developed the food theme. A dog, sheets, meat and ringworm moved into cheeseburgers, fridges and cooking a three-course dinner at night. STAR CO closed with shops, drinks, double-o'clock stages, digging dirt, putting EDDFIRST in the earth and needing a forklift to lift him. The verse is energetic and receives an immediate wheel-up, but most of it stays on one familiar angle.
EDDFIRST's first asked whether STAR CO was nineteen or thirty and blamed a difficult paper round. Paper became newspapers, money and doing free clips while waiting to get paid. A text telling him to kill STAR CO became listening to what Margs said. EDDFIRST called the clash the remains of what VARNTAE had left, then used cash playing hide-and-seek, a lost mind and feet nobody wanted to find. Spice, frequently dyed hair and a facial mark followed. He contrasted STAR CO's lack of stage reaction with the miracle and reactions his own writing could create, before saying throwing STAR CO into the crowd would be the only way anyone caught his wave. A cake-from-his-mother closer returned to weight while keeping the round broader and more opponent-specific.
STAR CO's second said EDDFIRST had once been slim before becoming fat. The central personal alleged that an uncle's kebab shop and sexual abuse had led to free doughnuts. A planned flight to Spain became eating cakes at customs and being removed when the aircraft could not lift. STAR CO questioned how EDDFIRST's legs supported him, then threatened his estate and family. Cheese injections, the fifth dimension, eating a sentence and stealing from Tesco's sweets section closed a short but coherent continuation of the weight theme.
EDDFIRST's second attacked STAR CO for acting like a bad man in a dirty tracksuit. One glove became Michael Jackson and keeping a hand clean for a cousin, leading into an explicit incest allegation based on a previous video. Smoking food versus emptying a fridge and smoking shots versus emptying a clip formed the central parallel. KANDI checking an irrelevant opponent led into STAR CO wearing a fishnet shirt and using Plenty of Fish. Rasta, pasta, disaster, fish, master and pastor created a long name-and-image sequence. EDDFIRST closed by recalling STAR CO bottling an approach to models and by returning to the cousin angle. It is considerably more layered than STAR CO's response.
STAR CO's third opened by warning EDDFIRST not to discuss cousins or press buttons because he had put his hands around J-Walks. John Wick losing his dog became EDDFIRST as a new fluffy friend who took long walks. Cuddling, a bed attachment and John's name became a crude sexual sequence. STAR CO then used riding and a leaning vehicle before Piccolo's Special Beam Cannon, Kamehameha and Goku formed a brief Dragon Ball finish. The round ends quickly and supplies too little material to compete with EDDFIRST's final.
EDDFIRST's third initially tries to play a controversial tune from a live broadcast before the host stops it. He then attacks STAR CO's attempt to market PenGame through an AG TikTok Live, turning marketing art into Stockholm and apologising on Margs's behalf. A mark on STAR CO's cheek, mirror imagery and spelled letters moved into asking why he rapped like he was casting a spell and charging it to hell. EDDFIRST revisited STAR CO saying 'mum's life' before mentioning TRAPPY and accused him of lying. Undertaker, Liverpool, Y2K, Chris Jericho, Venom, episodes, pterodactyl, velodrome, megaphone and echelon drove a long closing rhyme. A top turned red like fake Montclair preceded the final claim that nobody would care if STAR CO died.
LOTA scores EDDFIRST 3-0. EDDFIRST takes the first through the more varied paper-round, money, VARNTAE, reaction and wave writing; wins the second decisively through the Michael Jackson, cousin, food-versus-shots and fishnet construction; and takes the third because STAR CO's brief Dragon Ball response cannot match the contextual TikTok Live, 'mum's life,' wrestling and Montclair closer.