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ANBU SENSEI VS RELAPSE

Battle Result

LOTA Result

Clash Summary

ANBU SENSEI and RELAPSE met in Champions League Fixture 3. ANBU won the coin toss and sent himself first. The upload preserves no official audience count or declared winner, so the result below is an independent LOTA review.

ANBU's first combined battle history, science-fiction references and punctuation. Kneecaps and the impossibility of coming back after death turned RELAPSE's name against him. Peppa and George, a failed abortion, Star Wars through raising hands solo and Jabba the Hutt, then Alien X created a long appearance section. A dot to the head became a sentence, period and time of the month. ANBU referenced RELAPSE's losses to LC and SKAMZ, Reform and fear of darkness, Anne Frank, Gervonta Davis as a tank and Seth Rollins cashing Money in the Bank. A restart repeated most of the verse, but the completed round was substantial.

RELAPSE's first was compact and direct. Bursting heads led into ANBU's mother not having working legs, burning dreads became reheating work at Greggs, and Silver Surfer, swerving, flirting with death and a curb step formed the central rhyme. Squidward and appearance attacks led into the whole country being sanctioned, an ambulance and decapitating a man like Amberlynn. RELAPSE attacked ANBU's viral clip, KANDI making him look weak, and his performances in March, April and May before closing on Gohan activating and smashing him like a plate. The round lands, but is much shorter than ANBU's.

ANBU's second was the battle's longest round. He began by asking why he was clashing a random opponent, then moved through SKAMZ making RELAPSE cry, a miscarriage and a partner leaving for a darker man. Reform became fear of the dark, followed by dogs at night and an ex's OnlyFans. Jim Crow, Harvey Price and thinking Margs was white extended the deliberately offensive political material. A declined Tesco card led into Skyrim; Fortnite and Warzone created a gaming sequence; Taliban became a gulag; two packs became Tupac; and Hell's Kitchen became Wilson Fisk. ANBU closed with football-related misconduct references involving Adam Johnson, Benjamin Mendy and Mason Greenwood. A crowd reload caused almost the entire round to be repeated.

RELAPSE's second was fuller than his first and attacked ANBU's lifestyle and appearance. The cost of living became a box of chicken on tick; clocks ticking led into a room full of pots of urine; acne and spots drove repeated skin material. Sensei injecting acid, being over the top like a Jetsons jacket, expensive habits, flaking skin and the dark web followed. RELAPSE then attacked ANBU's anime schemes, trainer fetish, breath, family, self-harm imagery and living conditions before turning Dr Evil into Austin Powers. It was his strongest round, but ANBU's broader construction edges it.

ANBU's third shifted into television, music, social media and football. Phil Mitchell and Croydon led to meeting an end in the East; Joe Jackson, getting beat, Human Nature, forgotten lines, Dangerous, the closet and PYT formed an extended Michael Jackson sequence. Instagram, MySpace, Facebook, Snapchat, Skype, Twitch, YouTube Live and TikTok became a platform-by-platform threat. ANBU then attacked RELAPSE's political claims and PenGame pay before closing through Saka, Toney, Bellingham and Trent under pressure, Air Max, shells and an Arsenal red shirt.

The source ends after ANBU calls time. Margs asks the room to vote and announces the 48-hour window, but no RELAPSE third round is present in the recording or transcript. This leaves the final round uncontested in the preserved battle.

LOTA scores ANBU SENSEI 3-0. ANBU takes the first through the fuller Star Wars, Alien X, punctuation, Tank and Money in the Bank writing; edges the second through greater range despite RELAPSE's strongest response; and takes the third uncontested because no RELAPSE final appears in the source.

Performance Analysis

ANBU SENSEI

ANBU SENSEI wins the LOTA review 3-0. His advantage is depth and reference range: Star Wars, Alien X, punctuation, wrestling and boxing organise the first; politics, games and football misconduct fill the second; and Michael Jackson, social networks and football control the third. Reloads make the first two rounds repetitive, but he completes all three while RELAPSE has no preserved final.

Lyrical Themes: RELAPSE's name and kneecaps; Peppa and George; abortion; Star Wars, Han Solo and Jabba the Hutt; Alien X; dots, sentences, periods and menstruation; LC and SKAMZ; Reform and darkness; Anne Frank; Gervonta Davis and tanks; Seth Rollins and Money in the Bank; miscarriages and relationships; Jim Crow and Harvey Price; Tesco and Skyrim; Fortnite, Warzone and the gulag; Tupac; Hell's Kitchen and Wilson Fisk; Adam Johnson, Benjamin Mendy and Mason Greenwood; Phil Mitchell and EastEnders; Joe Jackson and Michael Jackson songs; social-media platforms; immigration and PenGame pay; Saka, Toney, Bellingham, Trent and Arsenal.

RELAPSE

RELAPSE loses the LOTA review 3-0, with his second his strongest round. His writing is direct and specific: ANBU's viral clip, KANDI battle, anime image, acne, habits and living conditions all appear. The first is too short to match ANBU's opener, the second is competitive but less layered, and no third round appears in the preserved source.

Lyrical Themes: ANBU's mother and mobility; dreads and Greggs; Silver Surfer, swerving and flirting with death; Squidward; sanctions, ambulances and Amberlynn; viral clips and KANDI; Gohan and plates; cost of living and buying food on tick; clocks and urine; acne, spots and acid; Jetsons clothing; sniff and expensive habits; flaking skin; the dark web; anime schemes; trainers and breath; family, self-harm and housing; Dr Evil, Austin Powers and John Wick.

Key Technical Highlights

ANBU SENSEI

Punctuation scheme

A dot to the head becomes a sentence, period and time of the month, turning grammar into a threat.

Michael Jackson closer

Joe Jackson, beat, Human Nature, remembered lines, Dangerous, the closet and PYT sustain a recognisable music catalogue.

Social-network sequence

Instagram, MySpace, Facebook, Snapchat, Skype, Twitch, YouTube Live and TikTok are each given a battle meaning.

RELAPSE

Compact first-round rhyme

Heads, legs, dreads, Greggs, flex, event, ahead, death, plebs and step create a rapid opening sound chain.

Opponent-specific research

The viral clip, KANDI, monthly battles, anime schemes and trainer material clearly target ANBU rather than a generic opponent.

Lifestyle second

Food on tick, urine, expensive habits, dirty dishes and a garden shed build a coherent poverty and hygiene attack.

Indexed Bars & Breakdown

ANBU SENSEI

Round 1 — No comeback

"I'm out here for your kneecaps — if you die, you won't come back; I don't give one fuck if your name is RELAPSE."

Relapse usually means returning to an earlier state, but ANBU says death makes that return impossible.

Round 1 — Star Wars

"I'm a star in a war if I raise hands solo — definitely aim at Jabba the Hutt."

Star, war, hands solo and Jabba the Hutt combine into a Star Wars scheme, with Han Solo hidden inside hands solo.

Round 1 — Dot and period

"I'll put a dot to his head for a sentence — period, it's that time of the month."

A dot ends a written sentence as a period, which also means menstruation.

Round 1 — LC and SKAMZ

"I would've never got smoked by LC and I would've never got bullied by SKAMZ."

ANBU uses RELAPSE's previous Champions League losses as direct evidence for the mismatch.

Round 1 — Reform darkness

"You and your people voted for Reform... you know how dark it gets in your dreams; you can't stand the drivers."

The political reference becomes an accusation about race and fear of darkness.

Round 1 — Tank

"Call me Gervonta Davis — it's like this, you can never try a Tank."

Boxer Gervonta Davis is nicknamed Tank, making the bout and military meanings work together.

Round 1 — Money in the Bank

"Think you're a heavyweight? I'm Seth Rollins — wait till I cash my Money in the Bank."

Seth Rollins famously cashed in WWE's Money in the Bank contract during a heavyweight title match.

Round 2 — Darker guy

"Why did your girl miscarry your baby and then leave you for a darker guy? Now I know why you voted for Reform — scared of the dark at night."

Darker describes skin tone and nighttime, connecting the relationship allegation with the political attack.

Round 2 — Skyrim

"Go Tesco and your card declines; you pay girls to lift them up and eat them up, and you call it Skyrim."

The game title is split toward sky and rim, following the lifting action in the crude setup.

Round 2 — Fortnite and Warzone

"Easily smoke this guy in a fortnight — in a Warzone, I could have man flying."

Fortnight becomes Fortnite before Warzone names another battle-royale game.

Round 2 — Hell's Kitchen

"Ramsey in Hell's Kitchen — this fat little bitch is Wilson Fisk."

Gordon Ramsay and Hell's Kitchen establish the cooking show before Wilson Fisk supplies the large comic-book villain.

Round 2 — Football misconduct

"Watch what you say, Adam Johnson... I don't care if it's true or false, your career is fucked like Benjamin Mendy."

Two footballers associated with criminal cases turn the allegation into a career-ending comparison.

Round 3 — Michael Jackson

"Right now I'm Joe Jackson — if you do well, you won't get beat. You being shit is just Human Nature, considering you can't remember your lines."

Joe Jackson's abusive reputation, Beat It and Human Nature begin an extended Michael Jackson catalogue.

Round 3 — Dangerous and PYT

"Dangerous trying to stay in the closet when you love touching a PYT."

Dangerous and PYT are Michael Jackson titles, while the closet and touching angle make them part of the accusation.

Round 3 — Social platforms

"Turn to her Instagram if you're in MySpace; now you've got a Facebook... if your body Twitch, I'll kick, then YouTube Live I'm streaming your death."

Instagram, MySpace, Facebook, Twitch and YouTube Live are fitted into one threat about place, face and broadcasting.

Round 3 — Football pressure

"Saka, Toney, Bellingham and Trent — pressure, what pressure? Tonight I'm deciding your life."

The named England players invoke high-pressure football before ANBU dismisses pressure in the clash.

RELAPSE

Round 1 — Greggs

"I'll burn his dreads — don't talk about pasties, reheating your work at Greggs."

Burning and reheating combine with Greggs and pasties to attack ANBU's reused material.

Round 1 — Silver Surfer

"ANBU's on a Silver Surfer flex — it's the third event, I'm gonna swerve ahead. You wanna flirt with death, I'll murder plebs and place his face on a curb and step."

Surfer, swerve, flirt, murder, curb and step sustain a dense internal rhyme while Silver Surfer supplies the comic reference.

Round 1 — Country sanctioned

"The stuff that comes out of ANBU's spots is enough to get the whole country sanctioned."

Spots are acne and locations, while sanctions exaggerate the supposed danger of what emerges from them.

Round 1 — Ambulance and Amberlynn

"Get this geezer an ambulance — I'll decapitate man like Amberlynn."

Ambulance and Amberlynn carry the sound, with Amberlynn Reid supplying the appearance reference.

Round 1 — Viral clip

"You were part of a viral clip — nothing you did was a viral hit. Millions of views, but KANDI made the prick look like a right old bitch."

RELAPSE distinguishes appearing in popular footage from creating the popularity, then names KANDI as the cause.

Round 1 — Gohan and plate

"I'm Gohan when I wanna activate... I'll break him apart like I smashed a plate."

Gohan supplies the anime power-up before physical breaking closes the attack.

Round 2 — Cost of living

"You're a victim to the cost of living — bossman ticked him a box of chicken."

Buying food on credit from a takeaway becomes evidence of the wider cost-of-living pressure.

Round 2 — Clocks and pots

"He'll get spun like clocks that tick, and his room's got lots of pots of piss in."

Spinning and ticking establish the clock before pots and urine continue the rhyme as a hygiene attack.

Round 2 — Sensei acid

"How did he think he was ever gonna win? Sensei must've injected acid."

ANBU's Sensei title becomes the subject whose judgement is supposedly distorted by drugs.

Round 2 — Jetsons jacket

"My last performance left him panicked — I'm over the top like Jetsons jackets."

The futuristic cartoon's clothing sits high and exaggerated, literalising being over the top.

Round 2 — Expensive habits

"You can mention sniff — that just means I don't pay for expensive habits."

RELAPSE reframes drug accusations as evidence that other people fund the habit.

Round 2 — Flake

"I can't share bags with him — the only flake that ANBU's got are the flakes that fall off his manky skin."

Flake means cocaine and dry skin, turning the drug setup back into the acne and hygiene angle.

Round 2 — Dark web

"He's been on the dark web, nasty grim — somebody chucks £45 on stage for RELAPSE to pass to him."

The dark web and cash on stage frame ANBU as seeking money or illicit material through RELAPSE.

Round 2 — Anime fame

"Man does anime schemes and he thinks he's famous — he smells like he stepped in shit, got a fetish for sniffing trainers."

ANBU's signature anime writing is dismissed as false fame before the line returns to smell and footwear.

Round 2 — Mint and breath

"I'm fresh like minty flavours, and his breath's simply dangerous."

Mint freshness is placed directly against ANBU's supposedly dangerous breath.

Round 2 — Dr Evil

"ANBU's soggy like socks in showers — try say that I'm Dr Evil, but you get about like Austin Powers."

Dr Evil and Austin Powers are opposing characters from the same film series.

Clash Highlights

  • ANBU's Han Solo/Jabba the Hutt and dot/sentence/period passages give his opener two clear technical peaks.
  • RELAPSE's Silver Surfer, swerve, death, plebs and curb sequence is the strongest compact rhyme in his first.
  • ANBU's Fortnite/Warzone, Hell's Kitchen/Wilson Fisk and football-misconduct references give his second exceptional range.
  • RELAPSE's cost-of-living and flake/skin lines make his second a focused lifestyle rebuttal.
  • ANBU closes with connected Michael Jackson, social-network and England-football sequences.
  • The preserved battle ends after ANBU's third, making the absent RELAPSE final an important archive note rather than silently treating the round as performed.
  • The transcript opens with previews from ANBU's second and RELAPSE's first before the Champions League explainer.
  • ANBU wins the toss and elects to go first.
  • ANBU's opening is restarted after only three lines, then much of the completed round is repeated again following a musical interruption.
  • Margs calls RELAPSE's first 'round two' even though it is his opening response.
  • ANBU's second receives a crowd-demanded reload and is performed almost completely twice.
  • The battle contains racist, ableist, violent, sexual, family, drug, body-shaming, self-harm, dead-relative and miscarriage material documented as performance rather than endorsed by the archive.
  • After ANBU's third, the host immediately closes the battle and opens voting; no RELAPSE third round appears in the source.
  • Voting is opened for 48 hours, but no official tally or declared winner appears in the source.

Post-Battle Context

Margs closes the battle immediately after ANBU's third and directs the room to the QR code, with online voting open for 48 hours. No RELAPSE third round, public tally or declared winner appears in the source, so the original unknown result is replaced only by the clearly labelled independent LOTA decision.

Judgement Summary

LOTA Result: ANBU SENSEI wins 3-0

LOTA round split: ANBU takes round one through the fuller Star Wars, Alien X, punctuation, Tank and Money in the Bank writing. He edges round two through greater scheme range across politics, gaming, television and football, although RELAPSE delivers his strongest and most focused response. The preserved source contains ANBU's complete third but no RELAPSE final, so round three is uncontested. No official PenGame tally is preserved, making this explicitly a LOTA result.

Battle Stats

Date31-05-2026
Views44K
LeagueSeason Champions League